Every year our “Expert” Panel comes together to judge all entries for the Eurovision Song Contest and they’re back to take apart the 2013 entries and rank them accordingly. While their characters and comments may be wacky, the scores are dead serious. All 13 panelists will comment on the song and rank them accordingly giving it points using a scale from five to zero. At the end you’ll also get to cast your vote in the poll. If you would learn more about the panelists and to discuss the show, join us on our Forum HERE

Let’s have a look at the current scoreboard:




Now it’s Austria’s turn. Natalia Kelly won the golden ticket to Malmo in February with her entry “Shine”. What did the panel think?


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5 Points


RobertDecent and stylish song from Austria. I also like the voice of Natalia, which reminds me Christina Aguilera a little bit. The whole concept of a song make a very good impression to a good-tasted listeners and it also may become a new found thing of good music lovers. The music and beat makes a song sounding very fresh and up-to-date. “Shine” is a song, which can be actual even after the contest, because it’s not typical ESC hit. This is a professional entry which I want do well in the contest



4 Points

Grandpa WatermanMy grandson Jettings will love to see the sight of this girl! But if he acts a bit disgustings I,I,I will give him the cane! But this has made me shine with a smile!



Scotty Too HottyThis is a charming song and her voice is unique. I’m prettysure this will shine on the night and will easily qualify for the final. I’d beshocked if it didn’t! They need to have a decent stage/set performance to liftthe song to where it could potentially go. The audience will love this song onthe night because her voice is so strong and is pretty powerful throughout.This is Scotty’s dark horse of the ESC 2013! Mark my words

Glittery S BobThis is a very interesting track by Austria. I like it, though, that girl wants to shine excessively! This is the minus of this song: it repeats the same musical lyric over and over again for 3 minutes. Anyway, I’ll have my magic fingers crossed for this nice lady.





3 Points

Emma Magnuson Austria has a cute song, but there’s something missing here. While it starts nicely, the chorus is not as strong as I expected it to be. And this makes it forgettable. Unlike my holidays in Austria, which were unforgettable. It was while I was dating Prince Amadeo of Belgium, who is also Archduke of Austria-Este. But his ugly sister Maria Laura got involved and destroyed our relationship. So the chorus of this song is like Maria Laura, destroys the rest of the song.


MorenikNot one of my favourites, it brings back terrible memories of a Dutch entry a few years ago, those aging men in those shiny suits put me off my dinner! Also the mould on top of it, but that’s neither here nor there. But it is a tolerable song. I can deal with listening to this, unlike some of the other songs.



Petronella PoetryA pretty nice feeling this songs gives. Almost that you starts to think that once again Elvis lives. The singer fits the song well it seems and she makes It even better. But the song is a little flat at times and there is a bit cold emotions, ´give me a sweater! Despite that, quite good from a country with high hills. And also a country with deep basements that gives one chills…


Dark MasterNothing much to say about this song. It is a decent ballad and the singer is doing a good job singing it. Not my favourite ballad of the competition, but not my least favourite as well. Perhaps Austria will shine in May, as this song could qualify.


Britni SpirsovicOK, nothing interesting here. Although the title says “shine” it is not a shining example of musical genius. The song itself is average, I have heard songs like this being discarded by my friend Maraja Keri in the early 2000’s. What I like is Natália’s voice, it saves this entire entry from being the epitome boring songs.


Alex ChandhokThe song is a ballad, but is much higher tempo than you would expect. There are jazzy elements to this, and it sounds very contemporary. Did I also hear a Xylophone? Have an extra point for that. My only issue is that first time around it sounded rotten. It takes more than one listen to understand. I like it, but it isn’t instantly likeable. Austria are looking good for a place in the final, but beyond that It’s difficult to tell. It may well struggle with the televoters, but it has quality.

Eau d'yre  LizzyLiz: Austria’s song is surprisingly decent compared to what they served us last year.
Eau: Oh dear. Austria’s song from last year is a song that many American backstreet rappers would feel too embarrassed to eh..sing. But this year is quite decent yes. It’s almost too decent and harmless. Do you think this one was made by the Swedish IKEA as well?
Liz: I don’t know, but it could be. There’s really hardly anything bad to say about this song. I hope she will really shine on the stage, because so far only her studio is version is acceptable. (to be continued)


2 Points



Barb E Dahl I always wanted to visit Austria….Down Under. It’s my dream to see a live kanguru and I heard they have millions of them. The song is as average as they come. She tells us we will shine and shortly after fight the shadows in the sky which makes even less sense than self flushing toilets (I’ll decide when I’m done). I’ll leave this one while zipping on my delicious cup of coffee, it’s the perfect song for that.





1 Point


King Valentino XVIII assume this girl has just won one of those vile, poisonous talent shows on the tv and this is her winning song. Listen to those vocal acrobatics. So annoying and soulless. She is sweet though, I will give her that. The verses of this song are even somewhat interesting… then the chorus comes “SHINE SHINE SHINE”. Go away!!!




0 Points






Now it’s your turn, go to our Forum HERE and vote in the poll.

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One Comment

  1. rajo

    April 2, 2013 at 14:28

    Thanks for the 41 points, experts! I would have put Ukraine ahead of us and not Switzerland though, but I am very pleased with those fair remarks.

    I for one think she has a chance like Lena in 2011 or Roman Lob in 2012. The voting reform might also help. I played the ESCnation scoreboard (which is not rocket science) and found out that 0 points from jury and 0 points from televoters under the old system could mean 6 to 12 points in the new one! So this looks very beneficial for us, who always struggle to fight voting patterns and alliances.

    Petronella, I have a deep basement and you can stay there unless you don’t apologize. But you can have regular visits by Barb-E Lister-Doll down under.

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