Sin #1.
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Sin #2.
Let's make a good first impression by splicing in two wideshots before the first headshot.
Sin #3
That jacket has more holes in it than this song's libretto
Sin #4.
Does this kid really expect us to believe he wakes up EVERY night to pray? Who is this kid, some modern day Jesus?
Sin #5.
Also if you're going to sing like
that in English, then why even sing in
English? Why not just sing in French?
Sin #6.
Although this song features no percussion in the musical score there are three life-sized drums on the stage
Sin #7.
Camera cuts away into a wide shot as drummer guy is about to hit it
Sin #8
The controversial keychange is conveniently ignored by the staging.
Sin #09.
That is not how you play the drums, lady.
Sin #10
"Fistpump to appear rebellious" cliché
Sin #11
Are we supposed to believe that Eliot is supposed to save the youth and the world? Really?? ... This world is f!cked, isn't it?
Sin #12
If you don't want our lies and need truth, then why won't anybody try something if it's true?... like, are you saying that your plan is to not fight and let the world burn if somebody admits to you that the world is trash? Nonsensical lyrics continue to be utterly nonsensical.
Sin #13
How many wide shots does this song need anyway?
Sin #14
2019 act draws inspiration from a century old recruitment poster in an attempt to appear Woke And Current.
Sin #15
Why are there cords attached this vest? Is the plan to pull one so the jacket can inflate into a lifevest and float him into the Grand Final?
Sin #16
The cords have "WILD" written on them. For a song about uncovering truth, it does a fair share of blatant lying.
Sin #17
Half-way through the song the ceiling comes down because the stage director has run out of both fresh and unfresh ideas
Sin #18
So far staging does a better job at selling the stage than the act performed on that stage
Sin #19
2019 song almost accidentally uses fascist hand gestures in an attempt to stay Woke And Current
Sin #20-23
Let's just add a sin for each Peace Hand visible on those f*cking t-shirts.
Sin #24-26
Also, using clothing to explain your message implies that your audience will 1) understand the message 2) care about understanding the message 3) not be distracted by how ugly those t-shirts really are. Three sins for failing at all three points.
Sin #27
Wow, we're almost 2:30 minutes into this song and nothing of note has happened. A song called "Wake Up" shouldn't be this good at putting people to sleep.
Sin #28
Belgium continues to f*ck up staging even without the help of Hans Pancake.
Sin #29
Because it doesn't fit the narrative anywhere else, let's just add an arbitrary sin for Those Vocals and move on without comment.
Sin #30
"Camera Tornado during the middle eight" cliché
Sin #31
Camera pans into a wide shot immediately before the climax.
Sin #32
Also, those are some pointless looking smoke pylons.
Sin #33
Random RainyWoods impersonator gets up to use the bathroom, signaling us, the viewers, what we should have done at second zero.
Sin #34
KAN ensures to make sure that everyone knows which broadcaster was responsible for wasting three minutes of everybody's time, continuing the storyline of KAN being a complete d*ck to the other delegations for no discernible reason.
Sin #35
Well that was an utter waste of a build up, hopefully the next song won't do the sa-
GODVER-
Eurovision Sin Counter: 35
Score on the Failometer: three Senneks out of five